2011 A New Decade, New Challenges

The upcoming 2011 New Year is the start of the new Decade and many of us are entering it besieged with a host of economic and health challenges.

Despite what seems to be never ending pressure from all these challenges, we must all embrace this decade with Hope and Resolve to make these years the best of our lives. If our passing years haven’t taught us anything, they have taught us that nothing good or bad truly lasts forever.

Step forward with positivity and leave the negative elements that have weighed you down throughout these times at the doorstep of this Decade.

 

There are so many things so wrong with this world and we all feel quite impotent against the powers that be. I personally like the saying of “Think Globally, Act Locally”, and I take it to another level by concentrating on the well-being of my child knowing full well this goodness and positivity will have a ripple effect that will engulf the world.

Don’t allow the economic challenges posted at the workplace to have an overbearing effect on your happiness. Take the time from the race to take your child to the park and walk barefoot in the grass. After work take a drive to the beach and just enjoy the feeling of being engulfed in the salty water of the ocean. Don’t think so much, just go ahead and live the moment. the responsibilities of the world will always be there waiting for you.

 

Be selfish if you must label it as such, an hour of this a day or even a week will reinvigorate your spirit and somehow you will see begin to look at those “burdens” that seem to devour your energy as “Challenges”. Don’t ever, ever give up on your dreams or ambitions and if you have children hoist and propel them to follow their own dreams even further than you have pursued your own.

The Climb is just part of the Ascent. There is the View, Effort and Overall Feeling of our Small Victories that must be savored along the way. G-d Forbid we Reach the Top too soon.

Happy New Decade Everyone. Make it YOURS!

My High

I’m here at Barnes and Noble enjoying my latest “culillo”, a $4.55 Chai Latte with soy milk. Like so many others I have succumbed to the craze of paying such a ridiculous amount of money for a cup of coffee. But I realize that most people do it to be in a social environment and when you look at both the effect and prize of a beer at a bar, this is quite inexpensive and less detrimental to one’s health.

Last night I was watching a war series by Tom Hanks, The Pacific. At the end of the series the soldiers come home and begin to cope with what is described as “Post Stress Syndrome” and I realize that I have gone through this for the past 27 years. I have also figured out that it has to do with the life question of “Why?”. I believe this is the same question we ask ourselves when entering a midlife crisis and accelerated when we survive what can be a horrific episode in our lives. We ask of G-d…..why? Why did this happen to me, why did I survive while others around me did not and then comes the other question we ask of G-d…..so now what?

With this in mind I feel that I have been suffering from PSS for the past 27 years. I did my part to bring freedom to a large number of people and soon afterwards inflicted damage on myself which took me these past 27 years to recover.

I now find myself practically starting from scratch. During all this time I have continually asked G-d “Why?” and “Where to from here?”. I can figure that my answers lie somewhere within myself and perhaps the best one is to ignore the reasons as to why things are the way they are and continue living out one’s role in G-d’s Divinity/Divine Plan, faithfully believing that your answer, it there is one at all, will come to you.

My attitude shifts with the effect of the caffeine in my “Chai Latte with Lactose free Soya Milk”-(sounds like such a Gay drink)….and I begin to enjoy the beauty and rarity of this unusually cold morning in South Florida (it is in the 40s and the sun is shining brightly). Bundled up people are making their way to work and among the rest of the sparse B&N morning crowd I sit by the window taking it all in.

I am thankful that I am going to my own little shop and be able to exercise my creativity and pitch it against the odds against me. Perhaps later when the caffeine high fades and I am faced with slacking sales figures, limited inventories and limited funding I will sink into the ever present reality of retailing. For now I face it all as a “challenge and not a burden” amid my little piece of reality.

My Kill

The boat engine was cut as we reached the stored GPS coordinates. Almost an hour ago in the weak light of dawn we had left the dock taking advantage of a mirror calm ocean. Jerry, the captain had done his homework and his prediction of calm seas was dead on.

The boat named “Barely Legal” surely reflected the nature of our four man“crew”. Each member had run ins with the law, all had been indicted at one point or another and two of us served a number of years in prison but aside from this our love of women, boats and the sea bought us together into a unique “brotherhood”. Today two of my buddy’s sons accompanied us. The boys were thrilled to come with us, to hear our anecdotes and partake in the comradeship that was so unique to our group.

Before the anchor was secured I was already in the water. The water’s  morning temperature mildly shocked me but it was barely noticed above the excitement. I immediately gauged the direction of the slight current and began to swim against it. I had the title of “First One in Last One Out” of the group and today was no different. It took me about five minutes to find the first of the immense coral heads we had found a few months back and my spear gun wielding arm raised above the water to alert Jerry where the coral heads were. In turn pointing in my direction Jerry barked orders to the other guys who were in the water.

Ricky was my “dive buddy” but I did not wait for him. I took a deep breath and went 25 feet down on my first “recon”. As I reached the base of the coral head and looked around. There were a number of snapper but the prized groupers and hog snappers were no where to be found. As I rounded the coral I spotted a number of lobster antennae jutting out of the ledges. I slowed down to conserve my air but in a bit over a minute my lungs were bursting for air. I ascended to the surface.

As I took the snorkel out of my mouth exhaled and inhaled and yelled “lobster!” knowing full well the rest of the crew would head this way. I turned over and began to swim towards the Southeastern end of the coral head where I was sure to run into more of them. About a hundred yards away I came across two heads separated by a marine trench. By this time I had been breathing deep and hard concentrating on expanding my lungs. I bit down on the snorkel, spurted air out to clear the snorkel of water, took a deep breath and descended to the foot of the coral about 35 feet down. I moved fluidly concentrating my leg strokes to be purposeful and complete becoming as fluid as the water I was engulfed in, I reached the bottom of the coral base and slowly began to circle around it, holding on to the coral and pulling myself along. Careful not to place my hands on the life coral so that I would not damage them. Suddenly as I made my way around a dark shadow darted in front of me and I spotted the first grouper of the day. But It was small and I continued to follow it.

There were a number of sea urchins around and a colorful school of Parrot Fish were feeding off the coral. They looked like a small herd of cattle as they fed and silt floated from their ravenous mouths. I took a detour down into the trench. There were a large number of lobsters there and one could tell these coral heads had not been fished for awhile if at all. My lungs were panting for air and I slowed down using up all the air in them. I slowly began my angled ascend lungs bursting and I exhaled to make use of the last bit of air in them. I knew I was getting my “Aqualungs” back. As I ascended I noticed a number of groupers peering from their holes.

Just before breaking surface I spit out the snorkel. I would not have any air left to push the water out of it. This was the set back to the technique I would use. Although by pushing all the air out of my lungs on the ascend I would extend my down time by as much as a minute, I knew I would have to literally lift my head out of the water to renew my air supply. Once I broke the surface I breathed in and out a number of times, took a reading as to where the boat and the others were, bought the snorkel to my mouth, cleared it, breathed in and descended once again to the base of the trench separating the two coral heads. As I began to go around the other coral head I noticed a large indention about six feet over my left and I made my way to it. When I peeked in I was face to face with a nice sized grouper. Underwater it looked huge and this meant it was large enough to spear. But a grouper doesn’t reach that size without being wily and this one was no exception. The moment he spotted me he took off through one of the crevices. I followed in and realized the crevice made it’s way out to the opposite side of the coral head. The grouper had stopped halfway and I had to push the spear gun after it in order to flush him out. As I did this I spotted a nice sized moray eel eyeing my movements. I made a violent movement and the grouper took off. I backed off out of the hole and pushed up over the coral and a bit away from what I thought was the exit hole the grouper had come out of. He was no where to be seen and I swam down to the base moving slowly. Still felt I had plenty of air left in my lungs but my timing had to be good in order to locate the fish and still have air to chase it. As I came across I spotted the grouper swimming slowly but aware of my presence. As I moved slowly towards it, it took off again to the other side of the coral head. Once again I went up to the surface to get my air and descended rapidly. As I did this I saw the grouper go out into the open water and I followed behind. I was thankful the visibility was excellent and about thirty yards out I could see another set of large coral heads. I tried to swim a few feet under the surface, keeping my snorkel over the waterline and keeping my fins from breaking the water surface and splashing. At the same time I kept a close eye on my quarry.

My eyes followed the fish over a small coral mound as I broke the surface and swam hard angled to the spot where I hoped to find him. Sure enough he was there. I went back up again slowly taking a lungful of air and descended towards him. I was going for the kill shot. This was my first dive of the season and although I had been doing the stair-climber at the gym for a week before my breathing was a  bit labored. I had swam a full hundred yards in a matter of minutes.  The grouper was swimming high over one of the marine trenches that snaked across the ocean surface and instead of going directly after him I swam to his far right taking the “high ground”. When I reached the spot I wanted to get to I began to make myself back to him thus confronting him from his right. I unlatching the safety I bought my spear gun up and spotted a number of large barracudas as well. As I closed in the grouper took an almost sharp turn to his left and reminded me that I was indeed in his element. I closed in. He picked up speed and approached a coral mound at about halfway and I dove down kicking my legs smoothly and in rhythm. I did not want to warn him of an attack by kicking hard. He began to pick up speed but continued to move to his left exposing his side and I began to swim with my spear gun ahead of me extending my reach and narrowing the gap. All the sudden he slowed down and began to descend to what I thought would be a hole for him to get into. I was a bit far off but I’ve made these shots before. I squeezed the trigger and the rubber bands launched the spear at the grouper. Everything seemed to go into slow motion for a fraction of a second and the grouper broke into a fast swim at the last nano second and avoided the deadly projectile. I did not hesitate and began to gather the trailing line as I kicked hard to keep  up with the grouper who was now swimming away fast towards another coral mound.

I gathered in the spear quickly aligning the shaft into the spear gun, pulling down the safety switch and wrapping the cord under the housing, in a few practiced moments I was prepared to take another shot and I still kept the grouper who had moved some twenty-five yards away in my sight. I was caught up in the chase and determined this fish was going to be my next meal. The ocean floor began to descend and I was sure I was in about 35-40 ft of water, way close to my limit and I was exhaling once again having run out of air and getting the last bit of it out of my lungs. I was about five feet under the surface and I was completely out of air. It seemed like an eternity before I broke surface and refilled my lungs. In a smooth motion I returned to the chase. The grouper was completely aware that I was after him and his complete attention was in moving away. Luckily there were a couple of coral heads in front of us and he slowed down to look for a safe haven. Most groupers don’t believe in swimming out into the open ocean for fear of a larger and more efficient predator. As I came to the coral heads I noticed a rather large barracuda was swimming above us a few feet under the surface. I made a mental note of that. My breathing was a bit labored and I concentrated on bringing that into control. I was swimming with the spear gun in a neutral position but now I began to pull back on the propelling bands and hooking them to the notch on the spear shaft. I was ready and I was closing in again. The grouper darted  quickly. I chased hard. Down to the coral heads base and around. I followed. He went up and when I chased hard he went down to the base again. I still chased hard and was running out of air. I chased a bit more and he went around the coral head once again I took a left angle and surfaced for air. When I returned my descend he had slowed down and I was approaching from his rear left side. I bought my spear up in front of me, released the safety and took aim about a foot in front of him.  I kicked hard and continued my angle a few feet in front of him. I was about four feet away when I squeezed the triggered. The spear gun’s release mechanism detached itself from the spear and the bands once again propelled the deadly missile. The grouper did not have a chance at the last moment it exploded in a burst of speed forward and down to just the spot I had aimed the spear to.

The spear tore into it’s skin right behind it’s gill and came out the other side. The shot did not hit any of it’s vital organs, heart or brain and was not an instant kill and could have been better but the shaft had fastened itself well and It was now a matter of moments to reel him in and avoid him from going into the jutting corals where the line could be cut or my spear shaft bend. All of the sudden the large barracuda that was above us attacked the grouper. The fish swam frantically one way and the next avoiding the ‘Cuda’s attack. I closed in quickly and bought him in. His movements straining my spear shaft but I had him away from the coral head. As I held the line with my left hand I bought the spear gun’s butt end with my right and smashed it into the side of the attacking barracuda. This bitch was not going to take my kill. I hit the ‘Cuda two more times and it backed off as I moved my hand up and secured the spear and the grouper. As I did this one of the grouper’s fin quills dug into my gloved and and pierced the base of my palm. At the same time the ‘Cuda launched another attack. In one motion I pulled my hand away and moved it up the shaft to hold the fish taking another swing at the  ‘Cuda. It easily darted the blow but it was aware that I could hurt it. I swam up the surface took in air and ducked my head under water breathing hard at the snorkel.

Keeping my eye on the ‘Cuda I grabbed a firm hold of the grouper with my left hand. Placed the spear gun under my right arm and unscrewed the spearhead. I quickly took the spear into my mouth, I was still underwater, I could taste the grouper’s blood on the spear, I pulled and released the spear allowing it to sink below me. Keeping a firm hold of the grouper, thankfully it had calmed down due to the loss of blood, I placed it into the catch net attached to my waist.

I bought the shaft up, screwed back on the spearhead, reloaded and promptly chased the ‘Cuda, who was mercifully keeping a few yards away while I was doing this, away. I came up and saw the boat was about 400 yards away. But before going back I decided to look for some more fish. I had spotted a couple of nice size hog snappers and those are my favorite. As I was making my way back I speared a small hog as well. I kept going and spotted another hog that was bigger than the first. I wanted to make sure that I had enough to offer Jerry in lieu of the grouper that I was planning to eat with my family.

Hogs are rather easy to spear. They are just plain stupid and if you just approach them slowly they will lazily expose themselves for a clean shot. It is rarely that I don’t get a kill shot right off when spearing them. As I swam towards this large hog it started swimming towards me. I veared to my left and when I came back it had it’s left side flank completely exposed. My shot was placed right behind the eye and is was instantly dead when speared. As I stuffed it into my catch net I realized I over 30 pounds of bloodied fish strapped to me and about 300 yards to get back to the boat. I was lucky enough to be up current.

As I began swimming to the boat I kept my eye open. There were plenty of fish and lobster around. I was sure this was going to be a successful day out and it would be hard to resist over fishing. But the truth was that I had more than enough with just the grouper. I was already envisioning how to prepare the fish using lemon, bijol a few other condiments, stuffing it with shrimp and baking the whole thing. A couple of bottles of Pouly Fuisse were at the house and my mouth watered at the thought of this. All the sudden I had an instinctive feeling come over me and I looked over my shoulder. Some ten yards behind me was a six foot shark.

I reared up and turned to face it. I had no idea how long it had been behind me and I could feel my beating heart try to explode out of my chest. The  shark was slowly coming towards me. Was it curiosity, hunger, I didn’t know fear came up and almost paralyzed me. Today I’m sure this is the same feeling that grabs a deer when caught in the headlights of an oncoming car. I did not think, I reacted and lunged at the oncoming shark. It swerved to the side and I swung at it with all my strength with the spear gun I was holding in my right hand. I realized I had the spear gun halfway. The shark seemed to swim away but I was caught in a fear panic. I yelled at the guys that were about a hundred yards away that a shark was attacking me.

Jerry had seen the sharks dorsal fin from the boat and yelled at me to release any fish I had in my net bag. For some insane reason I simple ignored him and continued to swim towards the boat. My heart beating a thousand miles an hour. I swam slowly and  delibrately keeping my head underwater and looking around. To my horror I saw the shark approaching me from my lower left flank. I turned to it and in once again despite a wave of absolute terror I swam head on towards it. The shark once again veered off upwards and to my right and I dug into it with the tip of my spear as I jammed it with my spear gun. It shot off in a burst of speed away from me.

I came to the surface and my breathing was so hard I felt I would hyperventilate. Unknown to me was that Jerry was already trying to undo the anchor and come after me. By this time the boat was under 100 yards away.

Despite the jabbing the shark had smelled blood and was not going to give up on what it probably considered an easy meal. It came back swimming pretty quickly. I saw it’s approach and strangely I wave of calm came over me. I took the spear gun in two hands and everything seemed to slow down. I took to the side and once again lunged hard at the shark. This time deliberately aiming for it’s eye area. The shark had turned on it’s side and had been coming at me with it’s jaws opened wide but the second the spear point touched his eye he flinched in mid attack his snapping jaws came within inches from my torso. I jammed the spear into his thick under belly one more time as he flashed by me but did not pierce his thick hide.

By now my fear had turned into rage and I actually began to swim after it as is swam by and began to turn to it’s right. I came at it and it swam further away. I began to hear the sound of the boats engine approaching me. The shark was about 20 yards away and turned as to make another pass but by this time Jerry had come up with the boat and came between us. I put my head below the water as I heard  Jerry screaming and turning off the engines. I took off the catch net and with one hand actually swung it over my head and it the back of the boat. I later found out it weighed 38 pounds.

As soon as I did this I put my head back in the water and looked around. As soon as I did the shark was under the boat behind me and I swung around to face it. I tried not to paddle my fin strapped fins frantically but the shark lunged towards me and once again I rushed to meet it’s attack head on. Before I came close it veered to the side again and I watched it swim off. I practically jumped onto the dive platform behind the boat and frantically pulled my feet out of the water.

Jerry was screaming obscenities, he had never dreamed of anything like this happening but all I could think of was that our buddies were still in the water and ripping off my fins I told him to go pick up the rest of the crew. Jerry gunned the engine and we started to go after them.

Everyone had seen my head bop up and down a couple of times and had seen the sharks dorsal fin break the water surface a couple of times as well but had not idea what was happening. A couple of the guys saw me lug the fish on board and described it as me “heaving a ball of blood on board”, I realized then that was why the shark had been relentless. Jerry and Rick laughed at my stupidity at not giving up the fish and I explained to them that all though I was scared shitless, no lie, “I would not give up my fucking kill”. At the end of it all it became a fish tale  that the kids, now grown men, recount to describe of my obvious insanity. Of course the tale has changed. I could never tell what kind of shark it was and I am sure it was about 5 feet long. The way they tell it, I had about fifty pounds of fish strapped to me, the shark was a great white from 10 to 15 feet in length. Jerry ran over it with the boat and saved my life after the shark almost tore off some part of me………in the end everyone agrees, including myself that I had become temporarily insane.

We’ve been back to that spot on numerous occasions. The spearing has always been good but for my part I’ve punched off a number of barracudas from my kills, even became pissed and shot a huge one, but I am always paranoid when spearing fish and I keep a good watch as to where my dive buddy is……

The Day the Night Found Me Dancing with Myself

One day the sun ceased shining on my path,

And it seemed my spirit was being punished by God’s wrath.

The few clouds in my life gathered to commence mighty storms.

I looked across the horizon and only saw thorns.

The lightning flashed across the sky.

and a raindrop fell in my eye.

For a moment I breathed the air fresh and pure.

Thinking of you then, was my only cure.

The rain began to descend

Beating a rhythm that had no end.

Tried to walk;

But it was meant that I should crawl.

My dreams had crumbled to the floor.

Surely God’s walked out and locked the door.

Is it an obstacle or a test, placed so that I would take a new direction?

If this be the case, I wish God used a bit more discretion!

For I am only mortal, and by his measures, my time is brief,

for him to hurl me into this confusion from which I find no relief.

This night found me dancing with myself;

Another soul cast on the shelf.

It was then that I reached in;

Into my heart, into my spirit, I had to begin;

To stand up, to forsake the rain.

Bringing up the courage, I looked through the pain.

And I witnessed as God and the fallen angel played until dawn.

Using my life as their pawn.

In one of their moves I had been cast into hell.

Didn’t God care where I fell?!

I felt a hand gently hold my arm and the Son took me aside,

As I tried to break loose, run and hide.

In an inner thought he explained to me: In the fire the hammer is molded, the steel is tempered.

It is thus that in adversity, that the spirit is strengthened or torn and rendered.

This if we do not overcome these growing pains;

We’ll go through life shallow of spirit, short of material gains.

We are in a way players in their game, allowed to participate.

Not in the moves, but in experiencing the outcome of fate.

For life is to them, a game in which we are to become angles or sinners.

And for the same, it is up to us to decide whether we are

Losers or Winners.

Luis A. Bouzon July 4-6, 1985.

I Have Joined The Republican Party!

I have joined the Rep Party and I have a few ideas to getting this Nation on it’s RIGHT way....First, let's cut back on educational spending, who needs an education when we have an Army they can Join and "Be All that You can Be?

Unless they can work at a munitions factory, heck, we can get it done cheaper in China...forget that. 

So let's keep them busy, let's start a War, It keeps the investors happy, protects American interests and if they can’t respect us, let them fear us. Venezuela first, cause we gotta protect American oil interests, it keeps this nation strong. At the end of that easy war our soldiers will be seasoned Vets.

Then we can go after Iran, after all everyone loves to hate that little Weasel and after that, let's kick some Chinaman Ass, we need the resources. By that time we’ll have all the Venezuelans, Puerto Ricans, Mexicans and all the other Beaners that we promised American Citizenship to in our Army. Hey, either that or we’ll give you a permit to work the US tomatoe fields for less than the minimum wage, which of course we should abolish along with the retirement age. By the way, I’m Hispanic so I can call a Beaner a Beaner and be Politically Correct. Oh, yeah, let’s not forget our Black citizens, they can join the Army or the fields,  I’m I missing some other minority? I’m sure we’ll find someone we can draft.

Next, Social Security....let's incorporate it into any properties old people own. The government will provide services, kinda like what the VA does and once they croak, they can turn over the properties to the government. Their kids'll be in the Army, what do they care? And lemme say about the kids, they should be grateful...we're gonna provide them with three squares and a uniform to defend the USA way of Life....What else could they dream of? If it wasn’t for our way of thinking they would have probably been aborted.

.....Small Businesses, forget that...80% go belly up. Let's keep the money with Big Biz....it’s a sure thing and that’s the way to protect the true American Investor.

Yep! I likes being a Republican………I’ve got a lot more great tax cutting and social ideas that will put these leftist right where they belong!

Testing with Pic

We can't always be "Teachers" with our children. But rather sit back and allow them to teach us what the simple pleasures of living were. Pleasures that we have allowed to run through our fingers with the sand of time.

Prophet Blue: Buckle UP-It’s Coming

OMG, after reading your religious based postings I have gotten a message from G-d, an Epiphany of sorts and I am now going to now ABKA as "PROPHET BLUE"! I know you all expected some kind of Angel but then again hasn't G-d dropped a few surprises on us lately?
Well here is my first observation. It seems that for all our religious beliefs we all have understood that G-d has a "Chosen People". Well, guess what? He is really pissed off at how the rest of the world has treated them and he is taking names down and kicking ass. Most of you think that He is the G-d or Mercy, Goodness and Forgiveness. Well I got news for you, I don't know where you got that impression, but read your latest and reworked version of your Bible and read what happened to the inhabitants of the Great Flood, Sodom, Gomorrah, the enslaved Jews, the pursuing Egyptians, the Canaanites and just about anyone who hasn't abide by His rules.
As much as these other "Prophets" and such try to complicate things, His Law is simple, "do unto others as you would have others do unto you". Hey Man, can it be any simpler?

There has been far too much blood spilled in the name of G-d, if anyone is going to off someone it's going to be Him. So all you fanatics who are willing to convert others in the name of the Christ, slaughter the infidel in the name of Allah, G-d's got a special place/Hell for you, it's called the Middle East where it's inhabitants have been killing each other in the name of "G-d" since time recorded. Move there along with the oil company executives and burn in oil. Oh, yeah if you believe that you are fighting in G-d's name, register your children for a special draft. For those of you who want to live in Peace, our fore father's established a special place on Earth for us. It's called the United States of America. Although we have been infected by special interest groups

Thinking of which, you all that believe in "Life" and want to impose your beliefs unto others. The "Choice" group is setting up a national register so that "Lifers" can register. Registered "Lifers" will be required to adopt an unwanted pregnancy. "Lifer" will also be accessed a special "Life Tax" to pay for their adopted child's upbringing, education, medical expenses etc. It's only fair don't you agree?
The other night Pat Roberts condemned the Haitian people of making a pact with the Devil to get their freedom from France. We in turn have been condemned by G-d for listening and actually following the advice and opinions of the world by Celebrities.
For those that are opposed to President Obama's futile attempts in turning this around there is an organization that you can join. It's called the Klu Klux Klan.
Yes, the internet has become the new Tower of Babel and information is now rampant, but ask yourselves how come that in all it's social advances of the last 100 years, society seems to have birthed a litter of mindless Lemmings?
I'm unhappy to report that a great number of you that are reading this will be dead within the next 30 years. It is G-d's wish, I know, He told me so, that you prepare the future for your Children. You are all guilty of allowing self-centered, profit-making, democratically disguised, stock holding bastards to ruin G-d's Earth.

The End or better described "The Thinning Out" is coming not bought by four horsemen but in the form of temperate changes, failed crops, world wars and the worst, drought of fresh water and famine. Mankind will never be wiped off the face of the Earth, it's was G-d's promise to Noah after the Great Flood. But he will indeed (Man) have the power to make his own Hell on Earth. Those that survive will continue to prosper and evolve to a higher form of life closer to the Grace of G-d continually opposed by a select group that in all it's contradiction will serve as what can be described to be "The Devils Advocate" because it is only through struggle to survive, not profit, that mankind can truly evolve in a humble and Graceful way.
Bless all you Children Who Walk in The Path of Truth
Prophet Blue Out!

The Day The Night Found Me Dancing With Myself-Yeah, it's Poetry!

One day the sun ceased shining on my path,

And it seemed my spirit was being punished by God’s wrath.

The few clouds in my life gathered to commence mighty storms.

I looked across the horizon and only saw thorns.

The lightning flashed across the sky.

and a raindrop fell in my eye.

For a moment I breathed the air fresh and pure.

Thinking of you then, was my only cure.

The rain began to descend

Beating a rhythm that had no end.

Tried to walk;

But it was meant that I should crawl.

My dreams had crumbled to the floor.

Surely God’s walked out and locked the door.

Is it an obstacle or a test, placed so that I would take a new direction?

If this be the case, I wish God used a bit more discretion!

For I am only mortal, and by his measures, my time is brief,

for him to hurl me into this confusion from which I find no relief.

This night found me dancing with myself;

Another soul cast on the shelf.

It was then that I reached in;

Into my heart, into my spirit, I had to begin;

To stand up, to forsake the rain.

Bringing up the courage, I looked through the pain.

And I witnessed as God and the fallen angel played until dawn.

Using my life as their pawn.

In one of their moves I had been cast into hell.

Didn’t God care where I fell?!

I felt a hand gently hold my arm and the Son took me aside,

As I tried to break loose, run and hide.

In an inner thought he explained to me: In the fire the hammer is molded, the steel is tempered.

It is thus that in adversity, that the spirit is strengthened or torn and rendered.

This if we do not overcome these growing pains;

We’ll go through life shallow of spirit, short of material gains.

We are in a way players in their game, allowed to participate.

Not in the moves, but in experiencing the outcome of fate.

For life is to them, a game in which we are to become angles or sinners.

And for the same, it is up to us to decide whether we are

Losers or Winners.

Luis A. Bouzon July 4-6, 1985.

The Match Connection-Connecting the Dots (o) (o), (*) (*), (+) (+), (O) (O), (.) (.)

I have come to learn the hard way that at my age it sucks to be single. Most of the women that are compatible to me are divorced with a few kids and an a-hole ex, bitter, selfish or nuts because they are pre-menopausal. That was the case with my ex and regardless of how many times I had asked her to speak to a therapist, it was always my fault. Today a magnificently beautiful woman, she lives alone, with our dog, hating all men and life in general.....but in the end she has gotten what she wanted. She hated my business, felt my child was spoiled rotten and set ME free. Yes, I am FREE and never realized how miserable I had been.So Last Friday night instead of going to some bar and observing half the people observing the other half and little clusters of people observing the numerous groups etc. I decided to go to the most boring place in the Gables, yup, that's right I went to Barnes and Noble ordered a Green Tea Frap and sat down to go over my Match.com search results.
Hoooo Boy! This got good.....I received 389 "leads", 'member I'm a salesman so I look at the world in sales terms.......So I had to start weeding through my choices.....first to go......the obvious “FNUs” (fat and ugly)....yeah, that sucks to have to put people out, I felt like a cross between a VIP room bouncer and some guard in Auschwitz.....but I've had my mornings where I have woken up next to a "ton of fun" that I had justified sacking up with by loosing count of my drinks.....it's not a nice feeling and for some reason they always felt and voiced that I "used" them....OK!
I also X'd the ones with no pictures, come on, on-line dating is advertisement. You gotta put your best foot forward if any. To leave out your picture is just plain stupid. However I must point out that I did request a picture from a woman and she turned out to be attractive, great in bed, a doctor and an ultimate psycho when she told me off for not calling her one morning two weeks into our "relationship"....
So after going through the obvious I started to look at the ones that only showed their faces in the pictures.....It's cool to see the hams hanging off the bones when they lift their cellphones to take their own pics.... of course I had a few that had these studio portraits......Verdict: The hams went, the studio portraits....I figured they were Realtors who would eventually try to sell me some property or try to get me to refinance....I read a bit into their profile and it they usually read like a grocery list, this is a characteristic that is not only dominant in Realtors. A lot of women have the tendency to do this .then I started to weed out the "Princess", those are the ones that list "shopping" as a sport......flush!
After that I went after the ones with the 4-6 kids.....Hey man, ever heard of contraceptives! I kinda feel bad for these women, they have given their best to some moron of a husband who probably ran away with some single, younger woman.....I just hope they are keeping up the child support. Mind you I don't write off women with kids, having a daughter myself they are usually the ones I have the most things in common with. They are also, because of obvious deprivation, most responsive to fun and I enjoy sharing my time with them. When I go out with this type of woman I wine and dine them conscious to applaud them for the accomplished women they are....think about it, to have to raise 3-4 kids on your own is not easy. I'm a pretty good father, spend a lot of time with my daughter, involved in her studies and always pay my child support on time and never asked for an accounting of where it is spent. This unfortunately makes me a "catch" in their eyes. But reality always sets in when they begin to unload their slice of shit sandwich on me. I make it a rule to "leave my baggage at home" when I meet a woman but unfortunately after going out with them for awhile they do want your support and commitment. As a consequence I have the knack of savagely pulling the plug on it all. Because of this I truly try to stay away. I really don't want to hurt anyone. As I wrote in my last posting, it's all about quality time......
After this elimination I began some serious, pardon the phrase...."Cherry Picking". I started to read the profiles and they get pretty monotonous....shopping lists really and at this point I get rid of the professional hookers....the ones that are nice girls looking for Mr. Right to love them and "spoil them"..........Flush.
By this time my rooster has dropped to about two dozen "favorites" and I have emailed them a brief note, basically, "I just reactivated my account and I have found many cute girls here. I find you to be a very attractive woman. I like to take things slowly. I would like to begin to communicate and hopefully meet in person". If I was fishing you may say I laid out my lines, now it's time to sit back and wait.
There are a few that I just have to take my time and write, usually these are women I want to piss off for some reason or another. For instance one posted that she is Brazilian living in Colombia working for a "Chapter" company and that she loves to go shopping. I was going to write her that I was willing to meet her, dine her, nail her to my mattress and send her home with a 200 dollar JC Penny giftcard but decided to write her that she worked for a "Charter" company and that she should pick up a grammar book while shopping......
Another "Pro" "winked" at me today. She is 31 years old and lives in Alligator Point 250 miles from Dallas Texas. She is 5'8" and her profile reads so professionally. I'm tempted to answer it and see where it takes me but I'm trying to keep this as real as possible.
By now you might be judging me to be one cynical angry man and other less flattering judgments. Truth of the matter is that I am looking for a woman that is compatible to me, BUT, as I have always advised people that are single, you gotta kiss a ton of toads before you kiss a Princess.....Keep you posted....

Is it Me or Does This Happen to Everyone?

I haven't had my carwash for over a month because of rain and timing. So Monday morning after dropping my daughter off at school I went to get it washed. When finished it looked like the shiny toy I enjoy and the world just seemed brighter driving it to work. I guess it had to do with the fact the windows were clean.
Everything started to fall apart the moment I went to park it.
I've been suffering from vertigo, the result of another "perfect storm" that i went through in August and still haven't recovered from, and so this seemed to affect me as I backed up the car and I hit a pole that is right next to my parking space......daaaaaaamn!@&?! I destroyed the driver side rear light.
Needless to say I started Monday on a sour note. I went on line and found the replacement lens for about 150. I figure that if I'm talented enough to take apart and reassemble a Rolex watch I can remove and reinstall one of these myself.
The work day came to and end and as I was driving out of the parking lot I thought I had been pelted by eggs. I stopped the car and it wasn't eggs it was bird droppings. I looked up and there it was, only one dove sitting on the power lines. Not only had it decided to take a dump at such an inopportune moment as I drove under it but this SOB must have taken what can described as the biggest bird dump in the Gables! G-d it looked like he dropped a couple of eggs on me!
I arrived home and washed-wiped the droppings off. The car didn't look as nice as it dis in the morning though.
This morning I woke up and when I looked out the window it was raining.......one of those drizzle type rains that don't wash off anything but brings up the night grime on cars and makes them look dirty.
Long ago I learned never to place my contentment on material things or girlfriends for that matter. At that moment I would have probably returned to bed and had a couple of hours of unbridled sex which no doubt would have made me forget about the days events but on fortunately I'm at one of those "in between relationships" stages and I have no woman to re-channel my sexual aggressions to so I'm having to "man-up" and put up with the bird poop. When I think about it, it's probably easier than putting up with my ex's BS. How did we get here?
The Match Scene: 
It's been almost one week that I have sorted through my Match.com connections and I have send emails to about six prospects. I received two replies, one informing me that she is currently dating someone "special" and the other one telling me how busy she is with work and her daughter's upcoming wedding. While doing laundry this morning I made a couple of "sappy" emails and send them to three other women. I am now going to find out if women do indeed like someone who is upfront or do they rather be "played". I think that I shouldn't change what has always worked for me.
Back to the Here and Now:
As I sit here at B&N on a Friday night I have my 11 year old daughter in front of me. She was dropped off for the third weekend in a row. Two weekends ago it was my turn, last weekend her Mother wanted some "alone time" with her husband. My Daughter warned her that she did not want anymore siblings. She already has a four year old brother. This weekend she is being dropped off because she is attending an every-other-weekend accelarated study group at one of the most prestigious schools in the county. 
She was one of thirty girls in the entire county invited to join this group last year and attended their summer camp.
Although I was very proud of her participation, I warned her very clearly not to get any ideas of attending the school because enrollment runs 19-27K a year.
As I sit here at B&N She has dropped off by her step-father. At first her Mom had told me that they were going to have dinner together, then she called me and told me that she was going to be dropped off. When I asked her why the change of plans she explained that "her son was falling asleep", hey, my daughter loves to be with me because I give her lots more attention. At times I feel that her Mother's idea of quality time is spend running errands and shopping.....I would make this an issue but I believe the other extreme is worst. She might want to have her spend more weekends with her and take some of my quality time with her away.
So tonight I have my little one and life is so good.

The Color of Truth

The color white is made up of all the colors in the spectrum. We cannot think of "Truth" in terms of "White" because it would be a truth that contains too many variables and therefore not be "Truth" at all.

Black is infinitely devoid or any color. We can find truth here. And this makes one wonder if "Truth" can only be found in a state of Death were there is theoretically, an infinite blackness/nothing.